deenaneed

Maine says, "Thanks a latte!"

I moved to NYC with the distinct impression that any and everything I could ever desire would be within a three foot radius at all times. A 24-hour sushi place? We have them in spades. Harry Potter’s peen? Up until Feb. 8, one had FIVE opportunities a week to see that. It’s really hard (hehe) to think about living anywhere else when you consider all that, right?

Think again. A topless coffee shop just opened in Maine. Now, I know we have premier gentlemen’s clubs in this city. If you crave some strange areolas, this is the place to find it. I’m pretty sure we came thisclose to putting “City of Strange Areolas” on our license plates. That’s a cumbersome saying, so “The Empire State” won out in the end. Still, people know what we stand for. That’s all that matters.

That being said, isn’t it a little embarrassing that Maine, home of nary more than delicious crab cakes and Caucasians galore, thought to open a topless coffee shop? It’s undeniably brilliant. It’s unconventional, entertaining, and helps one justify throwing down for a latte in this shaky economy. That’s the trifecta for a good business plan.

I expected more from you, NYC.